Saturday, November 20, 2010

I May Be 20...

I may be 20, I may have a job, and pay rent, and attend the University of North Texas full-time.

But I totally dressed up to see part one of the 7th movie release.

My friend Morgan and I during screen printing. Bonus points if you know who she's dressed as.

And not only did I attend the midnight premiere dressed up, I went to class, i.e.- walked around campus dressed like a school girl. Only the truly amazing people complimented me. I know I like to pretend that if Hogwarts were a real place, and I were a witch, I'd be in Gryffindor, but let's face it, I'm so Slytherin.

At any rate, I'm a huge HP fan, so much so that I usually hate the movies for being so untrue to the books. However, the 7th movie is definitely worth seeing. I guess since they knew they were splitting it up into two parts, they took a lot of time making it really close to the book.

But I approve of not acting your age all the time. Do something silly tomorrow, okay?

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

I've Got Mail

One of my roommates messaged me on facebook.

Firstly, I don't appreciate the tone of her first two sentences. It implies that all I do is sit around and bitch about them, instead of just the one post that took me like 15 minutes to write (and this one...)

Okay, that's technically not true. Like 90% of my blog is me bitching about someone, but I've talked about my niece, my ex-boyfriend, two of my best friends, random assortments of strangers, and my own parents. If I'm bitching about the people who gave me life, no one is sacred.

Secondly, I've heard from our "mutual friends" (and probably the same people) that you talk about me. Everyone talks about everyone, especially when they're irritated/annoyed/upset.

And nobody ever talks to anyone directly. Everyone always says that, but I believe they are lying. I didn't even get "directly," I got a facebook message (but since it was only my inbox, it's better.) I can only think of one instance where I would have rather someone come to me. The rest of the time, I would rather you keep it to yourself, even if you extend the definition of 'yourself' to include a group of your friends. Once again, everyone (and I am not generalizing,) bitches about someone behind their back.

Third, thanks for tossing the whipping cream if it was bad, but it's still considered rude to not tell me the reason it was gone.

And really, if you aren't going to tell me, "Hey, your whipping cream was bad," or "Hey, I'm going to have 10 people over so if you planned on watching Criminal Minds or sleeping, sucks for you," or "Hey, I'm inviting your ex over even though I know you don't want to talk to, see, or share air with him so he can awkwardly try to talk to you for two seconds before he remembers that you're not okay with his presence," then I am not the only one with communication issues.

That's why I blog instead of talking to people. I can say whatever I feel at that second and let it go. If we had an actual conversation about cleaning, I would blow everything out of proportion and be overly dramatic, and nothing would be accomplished (because when people argue, they never purely defend themselves, they always get on the offensive, and when I feel like I'm being attacked, I am out for blood.) According to Ms. Judy, I'm abrupt and rude sometimes. I just get the distinct feeling that whether I posted a blog or talked to any of them, they'd be mad, so I vented. It's not like the blog is a solution, I don't think it is, but I get all of the bitterness out so that I don't do or say something worse.

I really don't know what "rest of the world" you're talking about. Blogger has a handy tool that puts up statistics about your blog, and I know for a fact that post got 5 page views and no comments. So five random strangers glanced at it and weren't even inspired to post a "Sux 4 u." If I wanted to be an outright bitch, I would make a video complete with a soundtrack of a tour of the kitchen and post that on youtube where hundreds of thousands of bored people will watch anything (and I mean anything. Look up "smoking Smarties.") I just really don't see how 5 strangers who I haven't even met is any better or worse than two or three of our friends who I see everyday on campus spreading it around.

The fact of the matter is, I blog about everything I feel for my own sake. If you're offended or whatever, sorry, but you are a secondary character in the movie that is my life. I write about things, then I forget about it because after I release it, I'm over it. If I talked to anyone every time I was upset with them, I would constantly be harping on people because pretty much everything annoys me. Then you'd dump me. Just kidding (not really.) Really, it's just a blog post in a sea of blog posts that no one but me cares about. Honestly, if I had a nickel for every time someone on the Internet called me childish or immature or stupid, I would have exactly 35 cents. But I know exactly who I am, bitchiness, flaws, and all, so I remember that I can just post a video of a cat and everyone will be distracted and forget about it.

But since I have no intention of not talking about everything that pops into my head, and I'm not sorry for writing how I felt at that moment, I guess I'll just apologize for accusing anyone of using my whipping cream and post a picture of my dirty shower so no one maintains the idea that I'm of saintly perfection (because you all thought that, right?)

This just reminds me that the maintenance people haven't fixed my drain yet.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Home Training

My mom is pretty funny. Sure, I fight with her all of the time, but I love her. One of my favorite things about her is her ability to work idioms or little sayings she got from her mother into any conversation. If a little kid is in the store throwing a temper tantrum, she'll say, "You can tell he ain't had no home training (Grammatically incorrect even though she teaches English. Maybe we should pay teachers more?)" or if we go visit someone else's house, my mom will insist that my sister and I clean up after ourselves. "Act like you've had some training."

Well, mirror, mirror, on the wall, I'm my mother after all. Three months in my new apartment, I can tell that my roommates have no home training.

This apartment is never clean. And I'm not talking about my mother's clean, where you have to be able to see yourself in all surfaces, I'm talking normal clean. There are always dishes in the sink, there are always crumbs on the counter, there's always dirt on our floor (not technically anyone's fault since the rubber thing on our door does nothing to keep dirt out, but still, sweep that shit up,) and there's always dirty towels everywhere (technically my fault, but I'm not going to run the washer for one towel and I can't let the nasty towel stay in the sink as my roommates will continue to use it. Even when it smells bad. Seriously.)

It's not even just the cleaning, it's the food. When we first moved in, Hanna and Lexie went out and bought their own individual everything. Cassandra and I decided to share common things like condiments and baking ingredients. So we all have our own things, but sometimes I forget things. Like Cassandra doesn't like eggs, so she doesn't buy any. One time I happened to just grab eggs because I didn't know we were out, and they happened to belong to Hanna, and naturally she was upset with me for using her things without asking. Okay, I haven't used her eggs since. But I've bought two packages of Land O' Lakes unsalted butter (I'm a butter snob. It turns out margarine is made with some chemical substitute for milk. The more you know!) and they're both gone. I most definitely have not used 8 sticks of butter by myself, and Cassandra hates butter, so it had to be one of the people who has an (unopened) package of margarine just sitting alongside my butter.

I went to a funeral this weekend, and when I came home, my carton of heavy whipping cream was just sitting on the counter. Empty. And the remnants of whatever they used the whipping cream to make was just sitting innocuously in a bowl beside it. Like it's just cool that they used practically my entire carton of whipping cream to make frosting. Like they couldn't have purchased their own damn whipping cream or at least texted me to ask before they used my stuff. I wouldn't even be so upset that they used my whipping cream without asking if they hadn't used all of it. That's one of my pet peeves. Don't let me buy something with the intent to share and eat all of it. Leave me that last bit, and not a little bit either. A significant amount because I paid for it!

Anyway, I now know how my mother feels. I apologized to her. It is hella annoying to get up at 6:00 AM, go to school all day, then drive to work, then deal with kids asking the same three questions ("May I go to the bathroom," "What are we going to do today," and "May I help you?" The last one is almost cute until 20 different kids ask. Or just the same kid 20 different times.) Then drive home in rush hour traffic, open your door and prepare to relax and eat for the first time that day, and then realize you have to disinfect every surface in your kitchen just to make a meal, and then clean up after yourself only to have the same people who fucked it up in the first place come in behind you and fuck it up again. I am so sorry, Mommy.

I know it seems pretty hypocritical of me to insist that someone else clean up since my room looks like a tornado dashed through while playing tag with an earthquake, but the way I see it is, my room is my space. I can just close the door. I can clean when I feel like cleaning, if I feel like cleaning. But the kitchen/living room is a shared space with 3 other people, and out of common courtesy at the very least, I'd like for them to be able to use the stove without scraping egg off of it first.

And my room doesn't attract bugs. Seriously, sometimes I come in and see ants crawling around on the dirty dishes. Sometimes I kind of like to pretend that I'm a giant squishing people I hate, but most of the time it's just disgusting. I'm not even asking for the floors and windows to be cleaned, I really just want the kitchen to be spotless. It's how I was trained.

The moral of the story is, don't live with just anyone. They might be a nice person on the inside, but secretly waiting to leave dirty pots and pans on the stove because they've had no home training.

Did you think I was kidding?

Have a happy Tuesday!

Friday, November 5, 2010

Speak Now

It's a little weird that I like Taylor Swift considering all of her songs are a chick flick in musical form (in case you didn't know, I hate chick flicks. According to my Netflix account I like gritty thrillers and critically acclaimed documentaries.) Seriously, every single one is about a guy that she's in love with or how she wants some other girl's boyfriend or she's mad at someone. But I think I love her because she's the kind of singer/songwriter I'd be if I were clever enough to make my feelings rhyme.

One of my friends is just amazed that people continue to date her. Let me just say that I would love for her write me song. I don't care if she's angry or if she wants my man. I would give her my boyfriend for a song.

But seriously, Speak Now is beautifully written, clever, and as heartfelt and soul touching as her other albums. Taylor Swift sings to the love-lorn 13 year old girl in all of us, and even if you don't like her, you have to admit it's relatable. It's a little weird hearing the Pre-teen Song Queen singing lines like "There's a drawer of my things at your place, (Mine)" or "She's better known for the things that she does on a mattress, (Better Than Revenge)" but then I remember she's my age, and she's gotta "grow up" sometime.

I've been listening to this CD non-stop for a week. And yes, I bought the Target exclusive CD with 3 extra songs and a music video and extra Taylor Swift goodness. I read an article saying that country music is the only genre really selling CDs instead of people just downloading individual songs. But if I can encourage you at all to support Taylor Swift, I'm recommending the following.

Songs to Download: Mine, Back to December

My Personal Favorites: Sparks Fly, Speak Now, Better Than Revenge, Enchanted

Song that Most Reflects My Life Right Now: The Story of Us

So what are you waiting for? At least look them up on Youtube. Just don't look up the ones of her in concert. I love her and all, but she is not great live.

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