Countdown

This was originally a facebook note by my best friend Bailey. I didn't want to post mine there too and be a copycat, so my followers get to enjoy it!

Ten things I wish I could say to ten different people:

1. Stop bringing people to our apartment. I wanted an apartment to get away from people, not to have them over in my space.
2. Is it really that hard to put your spoon in the sink? You're standing rightnext to it. It's only one extra hand motion that takes 2 extra seconds.
3. Wash out the fucking wok. It's been sitting soaking in grease for three days.
4. I love you, but you're going to have to let me grow up eventually. I'm willing to bet money that my life under your dictatorship is the reason I have tons of social problems. It doesn't have to be big changes, maybe just letting me go to Starbucks without calling me every hour asking when I'm coming home. I don't know, that's why it's called "hanging out." I'll come home when I feel like it.
5. I'm sorry I'm not a better friend. I just have trouble forgetting that I'm not the center of the universe. Let's blame my parents, and I'll try to be nicer.
6. I don't know why you don't like me since I'm pretty sure I've never spoken to you, but could you at least put your passive aggressive eye rolling away? I'm not 100% sure, but I think I'm at least tolerable.
7. I don't normally like blondes, but I will make an exception for you.
8 - 9. I'm sorry I'm such a bitch.
10. You saying that I have "potential" is like a bitch-slap in the face to who I am now. I am enough.

Nine things about myself:

1. I know here and in real life, I come across as a whiny bitch. And I am, I'm not even going to pretend that I don't have my moments (or just one really long moment) but I do really care about people. I try to be nice, but my nice rarely registers. I'm just naturally sarcastic and cynical. And as much as I complain about them being in my space or annoying me, I harbor very little animosity towards my fellow man. You know, until they open their mouths.
2. I love books. I learned to read when I was three or four, and I ended up skipping 1st grade because I tested out. I haven't been reading for recreation as much, but books, I just want you to know you're my real best friends.
3. I'm not a clean person by any stretch, but I've discovered that I have real problems with people who aren't even trying to be tidy.
4. The only thing I've sewn since I've been to school has been a pant hem. I miss it.
5. I've always thought that I'm a night person, but since I've been in bed asleep by midnight for the past month, I think I'm more of a morning person.
6. It is physically impossible for me to stay awake during my history class.
7. Switching my major to fibers was the best decision I have ever made. I'm actually back to being an A student!
8. I cannot name the first 6 presidents, but I know the names of all of Angelina Jolie's children. Since most Americans can do this, I don't feel so bad, but really? America is raising idiots.
9. So you don't think I'm completely dumb, I can name the first 5 presidents: Washington, Adams, Jefferson, Adams, Van Buren. And now I can name the presidents around Lincoln. I think it's: Taylor, Polk, Lincoln, Johnson, Grant, Hayes, Garfield, and Arthur. Ask me again in a couple months though, it'll be gone.

Eight ways to win my heart:

1. My mom says that my dad ruined any chance for me having a relationship by giving me everything I want. This is probably true, but I still think there's a guy out there who has what it takes. I don't have to get everything I want when I want it (but I won't turn that down,) I just have high expectations, and you should meet them or exceed them. Is that really too much to ask?
2. I like one of Bailey's, so two words: witty banter. I like to argue. Not for the sake of winning or being right, just to hear what you have to say. I want to know your point of view on things, I want to know what you're passionate about, and fighting does it. So keep it clean, be funny, and say what you mean.
3. In the movie The Switch, Jason Bateman's character says, "Why do women always say sense of humor first when we all know it's a lie?" So you know, sense of humor is my #5. Being passionate is my #2. I don't care if it's running, writing, or sewage systems, love something. Being talented at whatever it is is good too.
4. If you compliment me, call me pretty or beautiful, not cute. People at church call me cute. Relatives call me cute. My friends call me cute. I want your job to be making me feel beautiful.
5. Listen to me. I'm having major problems with people just hearing me. No one wants to feel ignored, especially not a self-centered crazy like me.
6. Know who you are and know how to laugh at yourself. Most people take themselves way to seriously, and they don't even know what's what, myself included. I need someone light-hearted to brighten my day. Don't be afraid to sing duets with me in the car or dance without music or just be a goofball.
7. Don't try to get into my pants. Outright sexual attention just freaks me out, which is why I've never been on a date with any of the guys who've approached me with, "Hey, Bay-bay." It's terrifying. A better game plan is act completely uninterested and let me come to you (Pun intended. Just kidding.) I'm still not sleeping with you unless you propose, I deem you fit to have my virginity, and pledge 'til death in front of all our friends and family, but your chances are greatly increased by playing hard to get.
8. In addition to listening to me, talking to me is great too. I always hear that communication is the key to a great relationship, but I rarely see it executed. This goes along with my #2, I guess. I want to know what you think and want and feel, but I'm not a mind reader. Heck, I'm probably still talking about me if you're not saying anything, so you're just enabling my self-centeredness.

Seven things that cross my mind a lot:

1. CLEAN THE DISHES.
2. Why are there people here?
3. Everything is as it should be.
4. I am never going to remember all of this (usually pertaining to history.)
5. Where are my keys?!?
6. What am I going to eat tomorrow?
7. This will make a great blog.

Six things I wish I'd never done:

I honestly don't think there's anything I wish I'd never done at all. I think I would have liked to do things differently, but that's adding things to things that happened, not wiping them away completely...

I think that all six would have to do with how/what I say to people. Apparently, I'm abrupt and rude (and I'm not trying to be, honestly. I just tend to say the first thing I think when I think it, which is the problem.) So that and then high school.

Five people who mean a lot (in no specific order):

1. Daddy
2. Erica
3. Bailey
4. Cassandra
5. Elliot

Four turn-offs:

1. Smoking/drinking*.
2. Being argumentative (the un-witty kind)/always wanting to be right.
3. Close-mindedness.
4. Dishonesty.

*I was going to put piercings/tattoos as well, but I've determined that I also harbor a strange attraction to guys with both of those. I'm just a weird kid.

Three turn-ons:

1. Blue eyes. :)
2. Compassion.
3. Logical (Bay put "artsy." While I like art and art minded people, I have to admit that I am more attracted to the highly intelligent, straight-forwardness of logical people, i.e. Dr. Spencer Reid. I'm artsy enough for one couple. Although this isn't to say I wouldn't be with an artist either. It's just finding a straight one in Denton is pretty tough. I'm done talking now.)

Two smileys that describe your life right now:
}:( :)
Pouty and upset, but still happy. I might be either bipolar or schizophrenic. It'd explain a lot, actually.

One confession:
I'm fine.