Believe it or not, I used to be against the idea of procreation. From about grade 7 to 12th I adamantly protested that I would never have kids. This was partially because I believed that no one wanted to have babies with me, partially because everyone in Ennis got pregnant and that annoys me (On another, more pathetic note, is it sad that I believe the fact that I'm from Ennis, not pregnant nor have ever been close to getting pregnant mean that I'm unattractive? Because seriously, pretty much every girl from Ennis has a baby.) I used to feel like getting married and having babies was a cop out to leaving home and having an actual life. I wanted to travel, and be a famous fashion designer, and live in my New York apartment with my dog, and probably die alone, but at least I wouldn't still be in Ennis.
Apparently, I'm just a late bloomer, that's all. Fast forward to my young adult years, and I cannot walk past the childrens' clothing in Target with out pointing out the adorable baby sweaters or the baby section in Walmart without cooing over the tiny socks (seriously, baby socks are so, so tiny and adorable). I can't emphasize enough how much I hated the idea of having children when I was younger. Now I want like 8 (minimum 3, we'll see).
Can you really say no to this?At work on Monday, I mentioned that I wanted a baby. One of the girls said she'd be my baby, which is sweet and all, but she's 9, and I want a baby baby so I can get socks and smell that sweet baby smell and hold it while it's all squishy and wiggly (damn girl hormones). When I said as much, another girl told me to go have a baby then.
"Are you implying that I should just go get a baby? Where would I get a baby?"
"No, I'm saying go to the club, meet a guy, and have a baby."
I love that kids think it's that easy (actually, if I just wanted a baby, it probably would be that easy). I read an article in a magazine that said that men want marriage and children conditionally, like "I'll get married and have kids on the condition that I meet the right girl," whereas women plan on getting married and having kids without even meeting a guy. We just hope that one's out there, and eventually select one to fulfill those dreams. It's so interesting, but so true at the same time. I just don't want to be that girl, who picks out her wedding dress and colors and names her children*, but then never has any of that. But at the same time, if I don't plan on any of that, will it actually happen? I'm still gonna go with blaming the girl hormones...
At any rate, I want babies. But it is me, and I'm infinitely picky, so I most definitely will not be one of those crazies who want a baby with anyone. And no being like my mother and telling me that I'm too young to be worried about these things (because like I said, pretty much everyone I know has a kid). I believe it's never too early to worry about dying alone in your fancy New York apartment and not having anyone find your body until it starts to smell (damn girl hormones).
*Is it also weird that I've thought way more about being a mom than actually getting married?
Essence! I love your blog :) You're a very entertaining writer. I wanted to start a blog and reading yours pushed me to do it. I'm not such a good writer, but I figure this will help me get better!
ReplyDeleteI used to think that I would never want to have children of my own... But that thought has started to change as I started to get older. I dunno why...
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